Well, I've had my monthly meltdown, and I feel ready to face life and deal with "things" sanely again. I can't believe I get so emotional and OUT OF CONTROL twelve times a year. WHY??? Is there some drug I can take that will keep my behavior in check during these times? My poor, poor husband. He really does try so hard to understand and make me feel better. But, he is right....nothing he does or says makes me feel better when I am like this. I'm pretty sure he is at least as frustrated as I am! Anyway, I'm good to go for another month or so. Bring it on!
I was waiting to donate blood the other day, and this woman I know had just finished reading that red foldered booklet the American Cross requires each donor to read. She made a comment to me that really pissed me off (for lack of a better term). She said, "Have you ever slept with a gay man? I can't believe they even ask that question!!!" and she said this is a very disgusted tone of voice. I made the comment that I actually have slept with a gay man. Of course she laughed it off and went about her ignorant ways. I don't know why that made me so upset. I guess because she's one of those "holier than thou" mormon women who don't really know what they're saying a lot of times. I went home and told my husband what had happened and how much I hate this person. He just laughed and had compassion for her because of her ignorance. (And hate is not too strong a word to use because I've had other "ignorant" experiences with this same woman. I know her quite well.)
Another ignorant experience...I was visiting my parents last week for a few days. I love to see my Mom and Dad. They are great people and so much fun to be around. However, they too are ignorant. Dad was telling me about a high school principal or some other school official who knew about a male teacher who had sexually abused a 13 year old boy but did not report it. He then went on to say that the reason he didn't report it is because "he's one of those gay rights activists". WOW! My own father. He is basically saying that gay men are pedophiles! How many other heterosexual people think this is true?
I am shocked at the level of ignorance out there! It really upsets me. I hope be able to feel compassion for these people someday, but right now it just makes me mad. I am happy my husband is so tolerant. I guess he's been dealing with this issue on a very personal basis for a long, long time. It's only been 3 years for me. Sometimes I think coming out to our families would be helpful as far as the ignorance is concerned.
I am thankful our children are so tolerant and accepting of people who are different than they are. Our daughters' seminary teacher has said so many ignorant things concerning homosexuality. One of our girls gets so upset about this! She is usually in tears by the time she finishes telling us about what had been said. We tell her that the teacher is not a bad person, but just ignorant. Some of what she teaches the kids about homosexuality is not even gospel doctrine, as far as I know. We have a lot of discussions around the dinner table about gay people. We watched "Prayers for Bobby" as a family, and we've talked about it a lot. I am proud of our children for standing up for what they believe.
3 comments:
Dang hormones. I'm with you there, and I always feel bad for my poor hubby who has to endure it every month.
A couple months ago I was with several women from my hubby's side: sisters, aunts, cousins, etc. One of them told of a girl they knew who was divorcing her husband because she found out he was gay. (At this time, none of them knew about our situation). One of them said something like, "Geeze, how could she not know her husband was gay?! Some mormon girls are so niave." I don't think I was niave. I think my husband was really good at hiding his true sexual identity--I didn't know until four years into our marriage.
I don't think they realized how many people are in our exact situation. And many of them will never stop to really think about this sort of stuff, and crazy stuff will come flying out of their mouths without a second thought. That's part of the reason we have decided to tell our families--to educate. We've told just about everyone in Chris' family. I'm planning on telling my parents soon...I'm a little bit (a lot bit) nervous. But I think it will help them think a bit deeper about things and to be more sensitive to those who they don't even know are homosexual. Homosexuality exists more than a lot of people realize or would like to admit.
Thanks for making me laugh out loud! I too, am grateful that my husband puts up with me when hormones and emotions get in the way. He is amazing.
It is great to hear that your children are dealing so well with this. I have been amazed at our children, as well.
Prayers for Bobby is an incredible film that we also chose to share with our children. Some of the high school students where I work want to watch it for a GSA club activity, and I think it is a great idea. Unfortunately the other advisers of the club do not think we should let them watch it, but they (the other advisers) have not even seen it! Hopefully I will get them to watch it and they will recognize the value that it could have for these kids, for the hope it could bring them that someday their families can understand them, too.
Anyway, it is good to see a post from you! Hang in there!
I sent you an email- did you get it?
I'm glad to see a post from you- I only get to see your husband's point of view.
If I only got irrational 12 times per year we'd be in high heaven!
You're a good woman.
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